Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Just another day

Been having those not-so-feel-good days for a few days.

Maybe it's the exam, maybe it's the way things have changed around me...or maybe it's just me.

The exam's have been going downhill from day one onwards. Still can't complain. Coz I sure didn't prepare that well either.Even then it feels kinda weird (sad?) to do bad in any test.

Today has been the lowest so far. Nobody was home when I came back and I just had to crib about how lousy the exam went; so called up this friend of mine. Talked for a while.

Mom called from her office. Turns out she tripped and fell on the road on the way to office today morning. Couldn't tell her that the exam was horrible after what happened to her today. Remained neutral, "Hmm..it was kinda okay."

Went to the terrace, stayed there for a while, watching the stars and the moon. Strange calmess it brings.

[Listening to Norah Jones' 'nightingale' as I speak (type?). Peace. Serenity. Calmness. Thanks, akhil for introducing me to the song]

Called up sister and 'talked' after a long while. Had been fretting all evening...suddenly everything feels alright. Not that we talked about something in particular. Just the blah-blahs.

But still, it's like she knew. And I knew she knew.

Guess that's the way sisters/siblings are meant to be.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

I wish...

When I was a kid, my mom once told me to be careful about what you wish for.

That there was this angel flying above, in the sky, looking down on us, humans. And once in a while she would pull out her wand and grant the wish of the person directly underneath.

And for a long time, I would make wishes now and then, you know, just in case.

Today in a hopelessly bleak moment, I almost told myself..

" Damn! I wish I had Cancer or some stupid incurable disease!"

But stopped midway.

What if...what if, the angel decided it was me who was gonna get lucky today?

Be careful what you wish for, people; coz it just might come true.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

To post or not to post

The title so coz I've been debating with my ego to post it or not. To come out and say like it is or just keep on cursing you in my mind.


Okay, you there…this one’s for you.

You know what people do when they call you every damn single day for a week and still you don’t call back?

They start calling other people.

Or how about this?

I know you knew I was upset.

But what you might not know was that I thought you would call me when you realized I was upset. Coz that’s generally what “friends” do.

When they realize you’re upset, they call you then and there. It might not solve the issue but it sure helps to know someone’s out there looking out for you.

{You know, she called me even after I had told here rudely that I didn’t wanna talk. Thanks, babe}

Or that I would think it was you every time the phone rang. And it wouldn’t be.

Or I just had a fight with my mom to keep the phone with me upstairs in case you called.


[I know I sound kinda desperate. But I’m used to telling things the way they really are. You could see it as a desperate girl waiting for someone to call her or as someone who’s just upset that her friend let her down]

How do you expect me to open up and tell you what is bothering me after this???

P.s: I’m sure you’re thinking of calling me now, I’m not so sure about that. That’d be kinda embarrassing after all this outburst.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Its dum dum dum time again people!!

Before I start off, yeah that stupid tune’s still not gone. If I ever figure out the person who invented that tone, i'm gonna...well, i'll think of something nasty enough soon

So...

I'm feeling extremely happy today.extremely in its most extreme sense :) And that is weird (forgetting the fact that i'm happy for no reason) coz I've got an exam (Universityexam that is) tomorrow and I haven't studied a thing :) and I don't feel like inserting a sad smiley here..whoa! this aint happiness, it's ecstasy, people :D

Smiling without a reason sure feels good....Infact, I think I'm gonna burst into a song right now...*singing out loud*

This happy self was trying to study in the terrace when instead I ended up smiling at how my skirt was flying up in the cutest ever breeze ( *gasp!* did I say 'cute breeze'? cute breeze? cute???*rolls her eyes at the weird tricks the happy psycho inside is making me do*) and smelling the rose that just bloomed today. *smiles at the thought*

And I did a good thing today. I actally sent two mails. Ok, two good things then :D. Mail as in 'real' mail and not those stupid crappy forwards. Real personal mail typed by my very own fragile hands. Boy, are they some lucky people or what? :D It feels really good to send a mail after all these months of forwarding crappy stuff.

[ And you, I still think your response at my mail wasn't good enough. Next time instead of thanking me in your tribal language, try running out into the big beautiful world (smiles again:D) shouting out loud, "I've got mail, I've got mail"]

I was feeling so very happy that I thought maybe I should write it down to read during depressing times...well, tonight that is...considering that it's the time when 'actual' studies happen. I have an exam morrow, remember?

Uh-oh, I can see the girl next door studying like crazy for the very same exam tomorrow. Oh no, think a little happiness just drained off. Don't worry, I'm still smiling :). Infinity minus one is still infinity, people. And yeah, me thinks people like her shouldn't be allowed to study outside where they can inflict severe damage upon the blissfully ignorant happy minds of freebirds in the world. Infact, go study your @$$ off in your attic or something (mind your language, happy psycho!)....

So *a deep sigh*, it's me signing off as a protest against the nerdy girl next door....

P.s: Hopefully I'll have some of this happiness left after tomorrow's exam *Bites her fingernails*

P.p.s: It's morning and the happy thing's totally gone. Unfortunately, just the psycho is left :(

Monday, June 05, 2006

B-O-R-E-D

Dum dum dum….

The above three words has nothing to do with the post proceeding what-so-ever. The bloody tune’s been inside my head for a long long time now…Just can’t get it out…So what do I say when I have nothing else to say? Dum, dum, dum **in a tone that might be at its irritating best to the person on the receiving end**….

After days and days of pretending-and-trying-yet-unsuccessful-try at studying, I went outta the house (coz I had to, there was no other way. Darling dentist would’ve killed me...ps: I was supposed to go there like a month ago. Yours truly being an extreme perfectionist went exactly a month later).

First to the dentist’s where I had to wait for almost an hour…God, there’s no such thing I hate as waiting...The hour was spent reading oh-so-informative articles on the bloody ‘For-the-single-independent–women-out-there’ magazines----“how to patau your dream man?”, “why does he keep ignoring you?”, “Does he want something more??”, “top ten myths about men”….” How to seduce in style!!”…I mean, could you get any more pathetic?

And dear editor-who-cares-so-much-about-the-love-lives-of-millions-of-woman-out-there, *overwhelming with emotion* , I do NOT need any tips on how to find out if my man’s cheating on me…if I do get a man, I had better learn how to keep him entertained myself else he should go play jingilala (DON’T ask me what it is) with the bitch next door. And for those people who actually find this tips worthwhile, GET A LIFE!!!

I mean, why don’t people publish articles like ‘How to get awesome marks (that make your parents say, ‘I always knew you had it on you’) without using your brain fully or partially’. Bring out something like that and I’m damn sure there will be a stampede at the stores selling the magazines. I myself know enough lazy bones to cause a stampede :D

Group hug to all the lazy bums out there >:D< “we make others look good”

Coming back…after the dentist’s I went to this stitching center to get my brand new tops all shaped-up. The people there had called up yesterday to inform that it’s ready…and when I do get there, what do they say?

“There’s been some mistake; your stuff isn’t ready yet. Could you come back maybe two days later?”

Jeeez!!! I don’t want your bloody apologies; I want my brand new kurtas. Hmmpfff!!! Two days later it is then….*Sighhhh*

Yours truly returned home all disappointed, not to mention a stupid toothache that is inevitable after a visit to dentist’s.

I come back home to find the telephone line all screwed up. Phone line dead. The only thing I just can’t live without is dead (a consequence of which is that I saw mom dancing up and down in sheer joy forgetting for a moment the fact that she had a reeeally bad headache *rolling eyes*)…..and tomorrow being a Sunday…I’ll have to wait till Monday to make a phone call **wailing**..I know, I know…I’m gonna be soo missed

(For clarification, my internet connection being dial-up this is gonna be posted after the phone connection has been re-established)

Yeah, so all my happy things (internet and telephone) out of the question, I resort to the only thing left- T.V.

Flicking through channels ….saw the Ad of this new show that’s to come on MTV. This real-life couple, who are supposed to be “actors” in some bloody soap (probably from Kkekta kapoor’s some behenji wala soap) putting on fake smiles at the camera…the lady goes, “Tune in to see how we fell in love”…Hoo haa hee…yeah,right…The last thing I need, another lady ,who apparently thinks she has the smile of Julia Roberts coz she just can’t seem to get the silly fake smile outta her face even while talking, telling me how to fall in love, get married and live happily ever after…Don’t these people have any better thing to do other than just blabber out their, soo cheesy that it smells like dog poop, love story on television?? MTV’s sooo going to the dogs….**phhrrbbbttt at MTV**

Back to surfing through channels…now what do I see??

Our very own soo soo gay Karan Johar’s, pathetic than the fungus invested life of *****, film- Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghum…Oh wait… my fav. Comedy scene of all times is coming up…

SRK *all teary-eyed and for some reason (that I presume is his method of showing how emotionally overwhelmed he is…is that what they call acting these days?) whole body shaking like anything*…says something like, “Mera papa jaisa koi aur nahin hai iss duniya mein blah-blah-blah”

ROTFL…I mean, who the heck talks like that???

Next thing you know, would be the patni touching her pati-parmeshwar’s feet to get blessings …Wait a sec, that’s already been done…Damn it! Can’t believe I missed that :D

Since I just can’t stand any of Mr. KKKaran Johar’s movies…..back to flipping…flip...flip…flip….wait a sec, is it really who I thought it was??

Oh yeah, baby….its Brad Pitt!!!

**Doing a hoopla dance around the room…mom now pretty used to her weird daughter’s antics stifles a yawn**

It’s ‘The Mexican!’ on AXN.

Love the movie, forgetting the fact that I haven’t seen it fully ever. I mean…Brad Pitt, Julia Roberts…what’s there not to love???

*Drool* drool*drool*

That’s when mom seemed to have a thought that I might have forgotten I have a University exam this Tuesday…thanks, mom…I really appreciate it. :

So it’s back to ‘trying-to-study’ once more....

*Looooong sighhhhhhh*

Dum…dum…dum…