I’m stranded.
Right at crossroads.
Where do I go from here?
Hmm…I close my eyes and try to feel the air I’m breathing in...
“Move! Move faster! Or you will be left behind.”
A push from behind.
“But I don’t wanna move fast. I don’t wanna go that way. What if I wanna be left behind?”
Cruel mocking laugh.
I feel my soul being stamped upon.
“Silly. You have to. Maybe you don’t want to. But you have to.”
I sense the power and assertiveness in the ‘have to’.
Then it comes.
“Sweetie, I should know better than you. I have seen life. You’re better off this way. Trust me.”
Right.
I’m better off this way. Ahem!
Another push. Much stronger this time.
------------------------------------------------
And I move along.
Along with others.
Coz this is what I “need”.
I see everyone around me.
But I can’t feel them.
Infact I don’t even feel myself anymore.
I’ve become numb.
--------------------------------------------------
“Hurry, honey!”
And I move along….
This I wrote sometime back...when I was quite pissed off at the people around me, the things that I myself was doing and the fact that I was turning into the person that others wanted me to...thinking of which...everything's pretty much the same; the past and the present.
Right at crossroads.
Where do I go from here?
Hmm…I close my eyes and try to feel the air I’m breathing in...
“Move! Move faster! Or you will be left behind.”
A push from behind.
“But I don’t wanna move fast. I don’t wanna go that way. What if I wanna be left behind?”
Cruel mocking laugh.
I feel my soul being stamped upon.
“Silly. You have to. Maybe you don’t want to. But you have to.”
I sense the power and assertiveness in the ‘have to’.
Then it comes.
“Sweetie, I should know better than you. I have seen life. You’re better off this way. Trust me.”
Right.
I’m better off this way. Ahem!
Another push. Much stronger this time.
------------------------------------------------
And I move along.
Along with others.
Coz this is what I “need”.
I see everyone around me.
But I can’t feel them.
Infact I don’t even feel myself anymore.
I’ve become numb.
--------------------------------------------------
“Hurry, honey!”
And I move along….
This I wrote sometime back...when I was quite pissed off at the people around me, the things that I myself was doing and the fact that I was turning into the person that others wanted me to...thinking of which...everything's pretty much the same; the past and the present.
posted by InfJunkie at 7:40 AM
4 Comments:
Can relate to it a lot :-)
I have felt like this way many times too.. as if we are becoming or letting ourselves become what others want us to be.
But that feeling will pass, this feeling is associated with our age, rebellious, wanna-break-free, don't-tell-me-what-to-do nature of ours...
Soon a time will come when no one tells you what to do, how to do, when to do, then, you will be thrust on your own, and then you might miss not being told or directed, so while you still can, enjoy all this nagging, these are phases of life... like everything in life, they come and go...
Joined Campus placement/CAT classes? :P
happy that you attained a nirvana.
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